Category Archives: National Politics

Women Across Nation March on Washington:

Go On Girl, Get Down With Yo Bad Self

Damn, I must say there are truly some nasty ass, bold ass, bad ass bitches that walk amongst you, and please believe me when I tell you that’s a compliment and mean it in a good way.   I’m honored to say I marched with a whole lotta them yesterday, in solidarity, putting up a united front, against hatred and petty meanness.

Personally, I did it for the three sisters, five nieces, 2 moms, and more aunts than I could shake a stick at,

(which, they don’t like having done to them…I know, I’m just as surprised as the rest of you about this one too),

whom I call my own, for all my friends, and all my students, present or future, who identify as being a member of the opposite sex.

picture

Every last one of you who partook of yesterdays festivities, of which there’s more than a few of you, an estimated 2.9 million to be exact, or exact*ish, making it the largest protest in United States history…you all deserve to take a bow, or a curtsy, or give yourselves a bit round of applause.  Better yet, pat yourselves on the back and I’ll applaud for you.

Record Breaking Protest

I wonder how that one ranks in the hierarchy of the Donalds neverending pissing contest…Anybody else think maybe he’s compensating for something?

He’s always talking himself and his numbers up, and how he’s the best and blah blah blah, I’ve heard it all before only done better, by someone with an actual personality, that how I got my sham-wow and this piece of shit blender,  so with all disrespect, save it for another late night infomercial alright Donald?

Except, this time, he actually delivered as promised, adding his name did mean something, something big, potentially flirting with greatness.

Let’s Make Shit Great Again

To see that many people come together to make such a statement, so loudly had to be felt by him.  There’s no way he didn’t hear us, didn’t see us, doesn’t fear us.  For once, adding his name was all it took to do something amazing; though I find it more than a little ironic, that the just add trump recipe he keeps mentioning is actually for an anti-Trump and pro women rally, and I hear he’s not too fond of them, and we all know how fond he is of himself.  Jokes on you good sir,….didn’t see that on coming did ya Donald?

It’s gotta sting, more than just a little to know the only thing people are confident in his ability to do is to eventually make a mess of shit.  It’s only a matter of time before he does something dumb, and puts himself, his position, as well as our standing in the eyes of the rest of the world at jeopardy.  We’re already the laughing-stock of the rest of the world, but at least yesterday stands as a beacon, offering hope, though just a glimmer, not all of us have gone off the deep end.

Let Us Break Down These Artificial Walls Which Divide Us:

Seriously though folks, if you were one of the women who put the pussy grabbin, bad hair havin, non diaper changing, duck face makin, sorry excuse for a human on notice, Bravo, well played. [golf clap], judging by their alternative facts routine the next day, I don’t think they were ready for, or expecting all of that.

[golf clap]judging by their alternative facts routine the next day, I don’t think they were ready for, or expecting all of that.

Judging by their alternative facts routine the next day, I don’t think they were ready for, or expecting all’a’dat .

The overall solidarity between movements on the day of the protest, was super encouraging, we need more of that!

We don’t want more walls built up between us, carefully separating the “us”, from the “them”, the “haves”, from the “have nots”, we will not see a return to nativist beliefs, turning our backs on the “American tradition”, which is one disproportionally shaped by people who did not originally call this land their home, I believe they’re called immigrants, no?

We don’t want any more gated communities, exclusive members-only clubs, any more racism, and sexism, and hatred, or private yachts and most importantly, and folks, this is the one of which we should constantly be reminding ourselves, and everyone else of;  For these next 4 years, his ass, works for us, not the other way around and if he doesn’t shape up, it’s going to be yet another example of the universe’s cruel sense of humor (I kinda like it), when the nation says to him, “you’re fired”.

Isn’t it ironic?  Dontcha think?

So hats off to all you bold beautiful bitches out there, and I use that word endearingly…and to all you fellow down ass, forward thinking fellers, Y chromosoners down for the cause, and willing to stand in solidarity; enjoy what was a momentous achievement.  Shit, bask in it, you earned it, though only do so momentarily, for the hard work of changing this world into one that is”more round, less ugly, and more just”, to quote Paulo Friere, begins now, lest we lose this momentum.

 

Whether You’ll Openly Admit it or Not This Dude Will Be Missed By All

Regardless of whether or not you voted the opposing party into office (no judgment, well not too much anyway, ok, you got me, maybe just a smidge), it’ll be tough to deny the great presence Obama leaves some pretty tough shoes for the President-“elect” to fill right away too.  had that will now be void.  His successor typically tries to fill said void

Just so long as he doesn’t attempt to fill the void left by Obama’s exit and lack of presence with more of his own…his presence is what I’m referring to in this case.  It would just be nice to hear the void be filled with “goodness” and words like honey instead of the vitriol or venom we’ve grown accustomed to him spewing at us.  Nothing more than (white noise I guess you’d call it…though I wouldn’t call it much of anything, late for dinner, a monkey’s uncle, or rumpelstilskin,, nor would I touch you with a 10ft pole.  Something about it’s just, just grimy, trust me.  h

I’m just including his farewell address here because who knows how long it will take Donald Trump to prepare and get ready for me personally, dd

I’m just including his Farewell speech here for my readers, if I still have any at least, because he truly will be missed….and who knows when we’ll see someone class up the office the way that he did.  I’m unwilling to accept that 8 years of progress is now going to go up in smoke as a reign of blatant greed takes over.  I hope my worries are as unfounded as they are unsettling.

Spielberg’s Most Recent Blockbuster Hit Gets Palin Kicking and Screaming

You Remember How Every Year We Have This Very Blah, Very Very Vanilla Dinner For The Correspondents;

But For Some Reason, This Year One Sarah Palin Took Offense For Whatever Reason And Raised Something Of A Stink In The Process

Good, hold that thought;

That video above was one of the “offending” culprits; from this most recent White House Correspondence Dinner; I must say, I’m somewhat stumped on this one…. I know it’s not the only skit that was shown during the course of the dinner; but I just can’t see anything wrong with it, like at all.

While I’ll admit I hardly watched any of the most recent installment of this awkward dinner for awkward people, lovingly dubbed “nerd prom”, I feel fairly certain there wasn’t much going on in terms of the “edge” factor.

There exists a fairly well established modicum of respectfulness where while the line gets flirted with it’s never crossed; which is why the former Governor of Alaska’s response to it seemed so bizarre.

I’m Confident It Was Uneventful and Awkward; Just Like The Last One & Every Other One Before It

Yet, for some strange reason; as I mentioned before, Sarah Palin decided that now was as good a time as any for a wig out moment of epic proportions.

Oh the humanity! This is the last straw!

I can’t stand this stupid “nerd prom”, it’s a waste of time;

but only when I’m not invited; when that happens it’s actually quite funny.

She was wound up SO tight and seemed so passionate about it when she used the term “ass clowns” to describe those in attendance, I had to make sure it wasn’t the porn star that played Sarah Palin in the movie “Nailin Palin”; doing a double take.

Why else would the former Governor of Alaska only show this moral indignation over the practice right now? More importantly, how did she settle on “ass clowns”?

What could possibly have offended her so much as to draw such “wit” from such an unwitty person?

Could they really be jilted lovers and the reason shes upset be she wasn’t invited; she wanted to be Obama’s ass clown  too?

[duh duh duh! and the plot thickens]

I thought that maybe for at least a second, it really was her in that porno that came out bearing her name and likeness right around the time of the campaign;  “Nailin Palin” I believe the name was;  [shrug]

It was lookin like all she needed was “Obama“, or at least a kinda sorta look-a-like; a few cameras;

then it’s lights camera action!
That must have been where the potty mouth came from, right?

Sadly enough, my investigation informed me my theory was wrong.  Palin and the pornstar from “nailin Palin” are not one and the same; the porn star is still currently employed.

English: Camp Buehring, Kuwait - Alaska Govern...
English: Camp Buehring, Kuwait – Alaska Governor Sarah Palin talks to Nome, Alaska, native 1st Sgt. Dewey Green. Palin visited the Soldiers of 3rd Battalion, 297th Infantry Regiment, Alaska National Guard to learn about their mission in Kuwait. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

On A More Serious Note:

At least she’s taken something akin to the back burner for herself lately;  been able to keep her stupidity relatively cordoned off via a precautionary quarantine.

No need to dumb up everyone else’s otherwise perfectly healthy polluted air on her account now is there?

This approach is in stark contrast to the mistaken hands off approach during her failed VP bid in ’08, operating under the belief “how bad could she possibly be?”

It turns out if we had tried to answer that rhetorical question, the answer would have been pretty fuckin bad man.

I’m sure John McCain wishes he had that one back.

To put it into context;

dumb shit she said in ’08, still haunts us to this day, threatening our continued survival; or ability to learn anything new from this point on; and that’s not factoring in any random words of “wisdom” she’s offered the world since then; like the recent rant about the correspondents dinner (it was about time someone stood up to those “ass clowns” and their annual dinners; it’s only so obvious they’re at the root of our problems….).

Sadly, it wasn’t just those coming into direct contact with her stupidity who began to notice the effects;

In offering her an open Mic and a podium to stand on, we ensured the effects would be felt far and wide;

                                     Shit Went Viral

Before the sequester was even a glimmer in Paul Ryan or Eric Cantor’s maniacal eyes; Sarah Palin promoted deep and long lasting reductions; they were just of our standards.

At an alarming rate, many American‘s can do nothing more than sit and watch themselves lose more of their brain function with each passing hour; not just the typical television induced brain rot either; this is something else.

Hour by hour they stand helplessly by as the lose more and more of their brain function through no fault of their own; they’ve been victimized, by the steady influx of Sarah Palin’s retarded ass comments.

Unfortunately, knowing it is not themselves to blame for their leaky and shrinking brain.  It would appear that we have a first rate case of second hand dumb, (also known as “contact” dumb); in fact it’s the worst one ever recorded.

Once you’ve contracted it, the knowledge it wasn’t your own stupidity so much as your general vicinity to the stupidity of others that damned you won’t be a comforting thought.

I’d imagine it still feels pretty fucked up; kinda like getting lung cancer when you’ve never smoked in your life,  but slightly less fucked up on a scale of 1-10 .

I think both parties can agree on something for once; they’ve both adopted the catchphrase “friends don’t let friends get second hand dumb”

Side-note:

On a personal level, I do kinda gotta giver her props for using the term “ass clowns” not only in a complete sentence, but outside a fraternity setting (But I also have something of a potty-mouth as well, routinely making truckers blush). 
 
Well played Palin, well played; now if you could only work on your likability, you wouldn’t have to dish these jabs from the political sidelines along with the rest of yesterday’s news.

Dear Obama: A Letter On Delusions and Disillusionment Past and Present.

Here’s My Initial Thoughts:

Official photographic portrait of US President...
Official photographic portrait of US President Barack Obama (born 4 August 1961; assumed office 20 January 2009) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Obama sure talked a big game in ’08 , slightly downsized in 2012,
Obama 2.012 was with its original luster…it was also a campaign I was a small part of hoping to practice what I preached;
But the whole campaign something for me just felt, well, it just felt kinda off….
 
What should have been clue #1
 
No longer was he promising change; government cooperation, transparency, and efficiency; a more open and available presidency where the president could make a complete sentence, a president in touch with the will of the common person, not the corporate personhood, repatriation of our fugitive civil liberties…. hmmmmm I wonder
 
Not really being totally gung-ho about Obama especially his foreign policy, and knowing it would be the same under either,  I made what I felt was the least shitty of two shitty choices, opting to take what I could get in the form of his domestic social policies vs. their non-existence under Mitt Romney.  It’s only a few months into his last and final lame duck term, and I’ve got the strong feeling I chose wrong
Mitt Romney in Fresno
Mitt Romney in Fresno (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
 
The truth is, aside from his oratory, which is still good, but not great; certainly ranking much higher than Bush’s, he’s failed to deliver on any of these promises. Lately even his speeches have been coming up short, and falling flat and seem if anything empty, and lackluster.

Is It Time For Tough Love?

Despite having supported him on election day of ’08, and the campaign of 2012 as an intern, I have to show some tough love right now, because theres nothing I hate more than a fucking liar.

Dear Obama

I’ve had it!

It’s not me, it’s you; let me tell you why:

No more passes, no more silence, no longer will I allow my subconscious to ignore your repeated human rights abuses, persecution of web sites internet activists and whistle-blowers, or your escalation of the drone war and War on Terror.

The belief that it’s alright if, “they’re a son of a bitch, but they’re our son of a bitch” is both mistaken, and flawed. Just as it was when we applied it to brutal dictators willing to bow to US interests; Ngo Diem, Mubarrak, or Sadaam & Bin Laden; It’s flawed in the here, and the now.

If you were really “my guy” you would not be making empty promises you have no intention to deliver on. I wouldn’t be forced to make the least shitty of two shitty choices, forced to wipe and wash up afterwards either way….

You would be about that change you so clearly stated you wished to bring, boutty-bout it, but instead;

You’ve become just another political hack and a crony.

the only difference between yourself, and a career politician, is you’re not any good at it; obviously having no political leverage or capital as your failure to secure your agenda on gun control and the budget (sequester) make evident to us.  You fail to be effective at pushing for legislation many people actually want in the Senate with it’s Democrat majority, let alone the Republican House….

Your failure to do so despite the tragedy at Sandy Hook, yet the ease with which you took away or “suspended” our miranda rights in the wake of the bombing at the Boston Marathon has been most enlightening……. and appears to be your MO, your modus operandi.

You wouldn’t refuse to release the prisoners from Guatanamo, many of whom we have long known are not terrorists, to their rightful homes, having been unlawfully imprisoned and tortured for over 10 yrs…….

You wouldn’t have kill lists or claim to have the power to kill US citizens overseas with drone strikes…..

You also wouldn’t persecute anyone bringing it from the darkness of shadow into the light, by putting it online, speaking about it publicly, or otherwise making it available for the American people to find……

Frodo Baggins:

Elijah Wood as Frodo in Peter Jackson's live-a...
Elijah Wood as Frodo in Peter Jackson’s live-action version of The Lord of the Rings. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Far from the shire, you now sit atop Mt.Doom gazing at the fire, finally able to destroy the one ring….and you can’t do it, placing it snugly back upon your finger, fading away into invisibility, just like the you I thought we’d once come to know.

No longer are you behind those ideals and beliefs as myself as you once were, or claimed to be. A born again Christian, only in reverse; its like you became a Jehova Witness goin door to door to spread the word on nights and weekends.

Keep that gospel, drink your bullshit and your lies down with that Jim Jones Kool-Aid for all I give a fuck;
Just stuff it.

No More:

Your failure to enact any meaningful legislation, or to step above the fray and carry yourself with honesty and dignity in addressing the American people, your secrecy, half-truth, white lies and those of the bold faced variety have taken their toll on me, and on all of us for that matter.

The only transparency you’re concerned with is the ability to carry out an agenda and it’s policies so transparent nobody else can see it. The only rights are those you take away and give to the executive branch of government so you may better remain within the shadows, safely invisible while wearing the ring you once wished to destroy and now adore.

The only problem is, you’re not Tolkien, this is not “The Lord of the Rings” and there is no Gollum saving you from your poor choices and ultimate frailty of your will; There are no Elven ships to take you from these shores to Vallinor to save you from the burden of your choices it was a fictional fantasy;

There’s just us,

For you to restore your faith to me, to us, all you must do is make good on those words you speak, as opposed to them being merely empty words.  That is the true measure of a man and where you consistently come up short.  Until you honor your word as your bond, until you become worthy of the Nobel prize you won, until you step from the shadows, bringing your actions clearly into the light-as they should be, until you stop using the justice department to unjustly persecute those who embarrass you by telling people the truth you’re unwilling to tell; you are not a leader, or a man.

In the meantime,

I’ve had it! 

 

Caught With Pants Down On the Net: Pro-CISPA Lawmaker Deletes Retweet about Money Received from Pro-CISPA Groups – Sunlight Foundation Blog

Pro-CISPA Lawmaker Deletes Retweet about Money Received from Pro-CISPA Groups – Sunlight Foundation Blog.

It appears that that somebody forgot everybody’s watching when you’re online….

Michigan Republican Mike Rogers reportedly made a boo-boo on his twitter page, luckily for us, a fine denizen of the internet was kind enough to scoop up a clear shot for us. This is it down below.Mike Rogers Internet Privacy

I don’t know about you, but to me, that looks pretty damning.

There’s Nothing Worse Than A Poor Winner;

Really, there honestly isn’t.  When you’re having your ass royally handed to you, as we obviously are by our politicians; the last thing you want to hear is them gloat about it.  I’d like to think that for the most part I know how to lose with style and grace, minus the occasional exception that’s bound to happen at some point.   But this, gloating, is something that will instantly send me over the top.  It’s like he’s doing an end-zone celebration; except those were actually kinda funny, they didn’t make me sick in the stomach.

What’s It To Him If We Want Our Privacy Online Over CISPA: He Still Gets Our Check Anyways.

Regardless of what these politicians do while they hold their elected office, the one we elected them to on the first place, they get paid.  The more arbitrary and nonsensical the matter,  the better, far less likely to end up being settled.   As a whole, the class of havenots are beginning to be treated as second class citizens by our very own government… What good will any of those rights we squabbled and we fought for so long and hard have be to us if we never stand up and use them?  What good is free speech when you remain silent? Silence is the same as consent.  I’ve already talked in some detail about why the government should have the ability to look through our digital belongings online when it can’t do the same physically?  The FBI had trouble enough without all of the digitization to worry about, having a history for pursuing it’s own agenda in how it enforces the law, a fact that is proven again and again throughout history.

And this was before there was any potential bribe involved which is just effed up to a whole different level.  It goes to that whole being a sore winner again. ….  Instead of getting dejected or repeating things I left better said earlier, I issue a challenge instead

Are we capable of doing what’s necessary?

Be The Judge, Be the Jury; But Stay The Execution:

It is ultimately left to us to decide his fate for his transgressions; and by that, I mean those of you in Michigan, of course.  If he’s your representative recall him, or help to put up national pressure on him and the rest of government until it becomes too much for them to deny, or to bear.  If we opt to look the other way during this glaring example of political graft run rampant; will we ever?

Are we always going to sit back and wait for these politicians to uphold their end of our bargain (Obama‘s civil liberties track record is perfect example) before we make them?  We can’t sacrifice our interests or put them on hold because of things like election seasons or political expediency; election or not, difficult or not; we still pay them, and therefore, they still represent us.

Are we gonna end up as one of those “my lawyer fucked me” cases in Shawshank?

 

 

Why FBI Request to Increase Cybersecurity To Combat “Subversives” Is A Bad Idea: They’re Obviously Compensating For Something

FBI & Free Speech
This book finally sheds a little more light on the FBI’s illegal surveillance program and its effect on the Free Speech Movement and California electoral politics.

This book “subversives” has a great story behind it.  The author had to fight the FBI for 30 years, for them to release the documents he uses as primary sources, costing the bureau over one million dollars in the process.  I recommend this as a read for anyone  (as soon as it’s not $40), I know I will, and no I’m not getting anything for it.

I know this book would tickle my fancy, especially since much of it focuses on the Free Speech Movement, which happened right in my backyard & Alma Mater, UC Berkeley.  It also documents the effort put forth by the FBI in undermining members of its leadership like Mario Savio and other leaders of activist organizations.  By using these struggles, the conservative movement was able to rise to power through Ronald Reagan; first as Governor of California (running on an anti UCB platform), and then as President of the United States.

If you would like a more detailed review, Matt Taibbi wrote a great review of “Subversives” in the New York Times Sunday Book Review I highly recommend you check out.

CISPA Internet Security for the Government
Cyber-Security up in tha motha fuckin hizzouse!!!! Guess who’s back! CISPA has returned to secure your privates

Forget the Soundbite, Its Time For A Reality Check

I think this book holds even more relevance than it normally would because of the recent push by Congress for us to surrender our online privacy rights via CISPA.  Through what I know and have learned, I feel that allowing CISPA to happen is a terrible idea and must be avoided at all costs.  The only thing this “cyber-security” measure allows the government to bypass the process of showing a judge enough probable cause for theme to get a warrant for our information; which they’ll then use to prosecute us with.

Without needing a judge to sign off on the legal reasoning of for their investigation, the FBI will be given free rein to decide as they will the merits of their case……yeah cause that worked out GREAT during the 1960s especially with COINTELPRO, the FBI’s illegal surveillance program they used against political dissidents.

Eventually, we must draw that line in the sand somewhere or another,  so where will it be?  Regardless of our personal political beliefs, if we’re skeptical of Obama or not, or what our general feeling about our government in general is.; it doesn’t matter.  When it comes to increased governmental  powers at the expense of our eroding ones; we must ask ourselves, “when is enough, enough? and “where do we draw the line at?”

History Repeats Itself

The one thing sure to stay the same, regardless of party, or administration is the natural inclination for power to seek more power.  Look at investment bankers, elected officials, and police officers; for the most part, each profession is plagued by scandal, irrespective of their location.

For those law-abiding citizens inclined to believe this isn’t their problem because they aren’t doing anything illegal or wrong; guess what, you’re wrong!

Martin Luther King leaning on a lectern. Deuts...
Martin Luther King leaning on a lectern. Deutsch: 1964: Martin Luther King Português: Martin Luther King (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Look at the way the FBI investigated Martin Luther King Jr., easily one of the most respected people from the Civil Rights Movement, and in general.  Almost from the moment he stepped on the national stage, gaining the limelight during the 1955 Montgomery Bus Boycott, he faced constant, heavy surveillance from the FBI…

Countless hours of audio recordings and stacks of papers detailing all aspects of his private life, even the most private and intimate, all for his POLITICAL views.  What then, did these tax payer dollars uncover, for surely there must have been a good cause

And that criminal activity was;
…drumroll……drumroll…..drumroll……

[Maury Povich voice]

He had an affair

[GASP] oh the horror, I feel much safer now….. It turns out he WAS human! (i knew it).

Now I know I didn’t get shafted on that whole rapture business and miss that second coming of Jesus I keep hearing religious people talk about, YAY! I’m still in the running….. WHEW….crisis averted….I guess? [shrug]

(Or maybe it was part of the Federal Holiday vetting process, which must be something similar to sainthood….right?)

I wish I had asked for a receipt and could get OUR money back for THAT dumb purchase, or at the very least could have them validate my parking, cuz I feel kinda cheated; lightweight hardcore…..so should you…..

The saddest part of it all;  they actually took it easy on him.  The level of harassment and surveillance he faced was nothing compared to those the FBI viewed as being more “radical” oriented. Our government didn’t knowingly falsify or misconstrue evidence against him, as they did with Leonard Peltier of AIM; who still sits behind bars.

FBI Gets Down And Dirty; Real Dirty, Like A Criminal Would

FBI agents and provocateurs never infiltrated the SCLC, taking actions known to be likely at resulting in violent conflict leading to his death (or did they) as evidence would suggest was the case with Malcolm X, and members of the American Indian Project, or the Black Panther Party (yet again).

The only thing all of these people held in common was making too much damn common sense.  Our government IS imperfect and SHOULD and COULD do better by its citizens and the rest of the world; apparently they were just outspoken about it and received lots of media attention for it. an outspoken view that our government not only could, but should, do better by its people.

Apparently our freedom of speech isn’t actually free; just ask Bradley Manning (held for over 1,000 days without trial or charge), or Julian Assange (now holed up in a Central American embassy, to avoid US extradition efforts), it’s only free when it’s positive.  Negative commentators get taxed, and taxed hard by the government for holding that stance; a modern-day cookie jar the profit from curse words goes in.

Somehow, FBI agents and the government at large, find ways to avoid, bend or outright break those very same laws they have a hard-on to convict someone else for. I’d imagine this to be some legal wheeling and dealing and moral stretching exercise something akin to tying Stretch Armstrong to a tree and the back of the car; or like Andre the Giant somehow squeezing into a tiny tin box;  a contortionists!
……OOOOOO…….AAAAAAA……

only to find out afterwards Andre and the box never existed; it was an optical illusion……GOTCHA SUCKA!!!!!

…..the government and its  agents/representatives in the FBI and prosecution just didn’t agree with them not agreeing with its politics I guess….

Which is precisely why I don’t want them fumbling through my digital detritus; free to make whatever subjective interpretations they may, pursuing their case to the end regardless of how much bullshit it is…..just look at how petty they were in the case of Aaron Swartz.

Come With Me If You Want To Live

If you’re like me and oppose the increased presence of the government, all up in our kool-aid, then please show your support by signing the petition, or looking at what campaign’s the Electronic Frontier Foundation has going on, or the Internet Defense League, both of currently have online campaigns going on.

Or if you have other ideas to combat CISPA leave me a comment and we can work together on it!

If you feel that CISPA is a GRAND idea, or can’t even be troubled to think about it at all, suit yourself; you’re probably smokin rocks. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you’re having a train run on you by some guy named “bubba” and his buddies when you’re at Leavenworth Federal Prison for something stupid.

I think this is my stop, I’m getting off

All aboard;

Choo! Choo!





			

How’s About We All Get On Telling Obama We Don’t Like CISPA Anymore This Time Than We Did Last Time

How’s About We All Get On Telling Obama We Don’t Like CISPA Anymore This Time Than We Did Last Time

English: The Seal of the United States Federal...
English: The Seal of the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation. For more information, see here. Español: El escudo del Buró Federal de Investigaciones (FBI). Para obtener más información, véase aquí (Inglés). (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I really think we made this as clear as we could possibly make it for them, since obviously they are grasping at coming to terms with the fact that we just aren’t that interested and for some strange reason they just don’t understand why we don’t think CISPA sounds like a very bright idea.  I would rather put my testicles in a blender set to high for 20 minutes only to have every single one of my ex girlfriends there to volunteer to act as my nurses; at  the same time.  If that doesn’t say count me the fuck out, I don’t know what does…

I’m not sure how everyone else is taking the whole needing to go over this with the Government and their Justice Department cronies, but personally I’m beginning to feel suffocated by their neediness on this subject.  Anything past occasionally having to repeat myself and the boundaries of our relationship and I get the sudden urge to run for the hills as fast as I can.  Talk about a stage 5 clinger…

How much clearer must we make it that our digital lives are a no-fly zone (not that those have worked well for Pakistan so far…), it might have been cute or endearing the first time they asked and we said no, but honestly, now its just getting fucking annoying.  Its about time they got up out our virtual kool-aid and started going to therapy or anger management classes or something like that.

I feel like the FBI is turning out to be one of those ex’s you knew was gonna be clingy and would in all likelihood blow up in your face at some point only to say fuck it, holding on  for dear life and enjoying as much of the ride as you can.  Now it feels like we’re faced  with being at that point where they’ve way overstayed their welcome in your personal space and aren’t taking no for a reason like this is let’s make a deal or some shit.

Image representing Facebook as depicted in Cru...
Image via CrunchBase

Despite their adamant claims of not being interested in you at all, you come to find out they’ve been campin out on your Facebook, your Twitter, and your Google+ accounts and who knows what else….skipping straight over the whole socially awkward cyberstalker Mark Zuckerberg thing and going straight for full on pervert creepo about to be unwittingly caught in a sting on To Catch a Predator.

To Catch a Predator title card
To Catch a Predator title card (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Heres a novel approach, if the FBI, or any other government organization would like to know something about what exactly it is that is going on in our digital lives; they should try asking.  Obviously they aren’t past that whole stage where you have your friends find out when someone is interested in you or not  because the mere thought of talking to them scares you shitless. This is usually done via cutesy notes that folded like an origami ostrich and adorned with the all important checkboxes that need to be filled out and returned in order to decipher its meaning; all because you hadn’t hit puberty yet, or finally made it to high-school or whatever the case may be, I really just don’t give a fuck.

Now you’re faced with the unpleasant prospect of changing your phone number and moving or obtaining a new identity cause they just had to make shit awkward and turn out to be that crazy one everyone everyone has heard horror stories about from one friend or another, only now its your problem… great, just fuckin great…. smh…what else could go wrong…

Wax figure of Daniel Craig at Madame Tussauds,...
Wax figure of Daniel Craig at Madame Tussauds, London. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Just for future reference ya G men of the world out there snoopin around, I’m pretty sure that Daniel Craig playing the fictional character of James Bond already has the whole cloaks and daggers thing on lock; whatever it is you’re playing at, its giving off a strong creeper vibe, like of the charts strong.  I would recommend getting a life of your own to pick apart and some form of court appointed therapy to remedy that, at least until the voices stop….

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